THE SHAMANIC CURE OF MULTIPLE SCLEROSIS

A AUTHENTIC PROFESSIONAL TESTIMONY ABOUT THE SHAMANIC CURE OF MULTIPLE SCLEROSIS,

ENDOGENOUS DEPRESSION,

SCHIZOPHRENIA,

DRUG-ADDICTION AND DEPENDENCY ON MEDICAMENTS,

WITH THE SACRED POWER PLANTS (AYAHUASCA, SAN PEDRO, TOBACCO, GUAYUSA, ETC.) OF THE INDIAN-AMERICAN SHAMANISM.

THE SHAMANIC CURE OF MULTIPLE SCLEROSIS

By DEBORAH HOY (Australia)

Soul loss is regarded as the gravest diagnosis (in shamanism), being seen as a cause of ill­ness and death. Yet it is not referred to at all in modern western medical books. It is becoming in­creas­ingly clear that what the shaman refers to as soul loss- that is injury to the inviolate core that is the essence of the person's being - does manifest in despair, immu­nological damage, cancer, and a host of other very serious disorders. It seems to follow the demise of relationships with loved ones, career or other significant attachments.

Jeanne Achtenberg: “The Wounded Healer”

LAKSHMI’S STORY

My experience of meeting with the Sacred Teacher Plants of San Pedro and Ayahuasca in the foothills of the Andes in Venezuela has been extremely difficult for me to put into the language of my soul.

            After working with Simon Green here in Avalon for the past year and a half it became power­fully clear to me that to accelerate my healing process I needed to access these medicines, which are well documented to effect curing of immune disorders, depression, alcoholism and ad­dictions.

Now that I have experienced first hand their curing power, I fully appreciate the frustra­tion of healers with the current legislation re importation and ingestion of these medicines.

The medicines are a crucial component of the continuing work of their own, the patient's and the collective process. Those on the waking path throughout the world feel strongly that it is criminal to forbid their traditional shamanic use, but that is a whole other story which perhaps the master of this block will elaborate on further if he hasn't done so already or you might like to take a look at Dr. Valentin Hampejs' view on this subject below.

"To be able to liberate the subtle energy scheme (the cellular and reticular memory) of the body from such negative, destructive energies and to load it ("vitaminize" it) with natural vital forces, much deeper and more efficient instruments are needed than those that are at the disposal of the conventional psychotherapy, that is: the employment shamanically ad­ministered of the so cal/ed "Sacred Power Plants" of the Indian-American Shamanism.

Their notorious incrimination as "drugs" by the WHO (World Health Organization) is not only antiquated, because it has always been objectionable by the light of the an­ces­tral wis­dom of Sha­man­ism, but is to­tally ab­surd and truly gro­tesque, be­cause ­among other things - the “Sacred Power Plants" are also ex­tremely ca­pa­ble to cure even the very drug-ad­dic­tion, be­ing equally in­cur­able for the for­mal medi­cine! 

DR. VALENTIN MD. INTRODUCING IN SHAMANIC MEDICINE

  VHampejs@gmail.com 

                                                                                                                                       Why, to tell the truth, should the psychocatalytic or sha­manic medi­cines - that don't pro­duce any de­pend­ence and are char­ac­ter­ized by a heal­ing power in­ac­ces­si­ble for the for­mal medi­cine, if they are used expertly by an ex­peri­enced sha­man - be pro­hib­ited?; when such heavy poi­sons, gravely ad­dic­tive, as the opium or the mor­phine can be used le­gally in our clinics? - Maybe, only because the doctors don't know how to man­age the sha­manic medicines? In the in­ter­est for the health of the whole humanity, the re­ju­ve­nated in­vesti­ga­tion - but now car­ried through se­ri­ously un­der a com­pe­tent, i.e. sha­manic guid­ance! - of the heal­ing ef­fects of these psychocatalytic medi­cines has ended up be­ing from now on an unconditional de­mand of our time that should not be more post­poned .                              

.......... Where was I? .......  Oh! Yes.

Simon, ini­ti­ated in South Ameri­can sha­manic tra­di­tions in Co­lom­bia and Bra­zil, was keen to meet with the sa­cred plant medi­cine Ayahuasca again. He found Dr. Valen­tin Ham­pejs via an ar­ti­cle he had read whilst re­search­ing the plant medi­cines over the inter­net. This ar­ti­cle, writ­ten by Alan Shoe­maker ti­tled 'Grace and Mad­ness' www.chin­chilejo.yage.net/grace.html is a lengthy tome at 44 pages but SO worth the read.

Here was found a de­scrip­tion of the good Dr. that piqued Simon's in­ter­est enough to in­ves­ti­gate Dr Ham­pejs' work fur­ther. Alan, like us, was search­ing for ex­peri­enced curanderos’ (heal­ers’) work­ing with both the plant medi­cines of San Pedro and Aya­huasca. Here is what Alan Shoemaker has to say about Valentin Hampejs. Valentin - Dr. Valentin Hampejs, neurologist, psychiatrist, and doctor of general medicine.

Born, raised and educated in Vienna, Austria. He is the most amazing shaman that I have ever been around. Talking the talk and walking the walk is, in the beginning, a very, very difficult thing to do. We all fall off here and there; I know I do and make no pretenses about it. It is very diffi­cult to maintain when you are constantly visited by friends and family and when you are raising a family. Once my children were born, it became very difficult. Cooking for two different styles of life, for instance, is complicated and expensive. And in the heat of the jungle, there is nothing like an ice cold beer to satisfy you. Therefore, I have not even attempted to walk the walk for years now.

Edna, Valentin’s wife is truly amazing too and works hand in hand with Valen­tin. They have two children also. Valen­tin? - The chil­dren are com­pletely raised within the walk and know no other way. He prac­tices mod­ern medi­cine as well as shamanism / curander­ismo. His house and his body is an al­tar. In addition, he is a very, very funny man, loves to laugh and it is a laugh that is in­fec­tious. He is the only curandero / sha­man in Ecuador that is ac­tu­ally li­censed by the gov­ern­ment of Ec­ua­dor to ad­min­is­ter the Sa­cred Power Plants. If you want to see more of him: www.chin­chilejo.yage.net He is the real deal and there are not many like him...And Alan states, "This is truly an amaz­ing man, an ex­cellent shaman and the only curandero that I know that I would use that term sha­man for.”

HISTORY OF MY ILLNESS

For those who do not know me per­son­ally, 12 years ago I was di­ag­nosed with a de­my­e­li­nat­ing con­di­tion la­belled mul­ti­ple scle­ro­sis. For those not fa­mil­iar with MS (Mul­ti­ple Scle­ro­sis), medi­cos think that the body mis­tak­enly di­rects an­ti­bod­ies and white blood cells against pro­teins in the mye­lin sheath, which sur­rounds nerves in your brain and spi­nal cord. This causes in­flam­ma­tion and in­jury to the sheath and ul­ti­mately to the nerves that it sur­rounds. It frays the nerves. The re­sult may be mul­ti­ple ar­eas of scar­ring (scle­ro­sis). Even­tu­ally, this dam­age can slow or block the nerve sig­nals that con­trol mus­cle coor­di­na­tion, strength, sen­sa­tion and vi­sion - of­ten lead­ing to com­plete de­bili­ta­tion.

One day in Sep­tem­ber 1994, I went to work as usual but some­thing oc­curred that was to change my world com­pletely. Af­ter spray­ing my­self with a rose wa­ter at­om­iser, I felt a tin­gling sen­sa­tion down the centre of my face similar to the numb­ness ex­peri­enced by a dental in­jec­tion. I re­turned home soon af­ter this, as I found the ac­com­pa­ny­ing nau­sea and head­ache over­whelm­ing. By night­fall, I called my brother James (my part­ner was away in Viet­nam) to come and stay over­night with me, as I was very dis­ori­en­tated and fear­ful. The nau­sea and diz­zi­ness was so over­whelm­ing I was crawl­ing to the loo to vomit. Be­tween the bouts of crawl­ing and vom­it­ing, I just lay in my bed hold­ing onto my neck in an at­tempt to calm the elec­tri­cal spark­ing go­ing on in­side my head.

By morn­ing, I had been ad­mit­ted to hos­pi­tal un­able to walk. The vom­it­ing con­tin­ued, I was para­lysed down my right leg; my vision was fail­ing rap­idly, as was my speech and coor­di­na­tion.

The head­ache was of phe­nome­nal pro­por­tions, with fright­en­ing in­ter­mit­tent head trem­ors and a de­bili­tat­ing fa­tigue.

Turned out that the fa­tigue would not go away for twelve years.

I genu­inely thought I was about to die - yes white light was pre­sent.

Days later, af­ter the on­slaught of a bat­tery of neu­ro­logi­cal, patho­logi­cal and di­ag­nos­tic tests (you can imag­ine how much I was feel­ing like be­ing prod­ded and poked re­lent­lessly at this point) it was GUESSED that per­haps I had had a stroke, or may have a brain tu­mour. Af­ter staff de­liv­ered this news to us, I re­call waft­ing in and out of con­scious­ness many times, vaguely aware of the grave faces of fam­ily friends and medi­cal staff.

As I lay in my hos­pi­tal bed four weeks later, feel­ing and look­ing so wasted. my body full of numb­ness, still un­able to walk un­aided or see fully, I mused daily “If it's a tu­mour, I am off to live in the rain­for­est, up in the trees with a stream of young lov­ers, cases of Moet, plen­ti­ful ganja and an unlim­ited tropi­cal fruit sup­ply, 7 beau­ti­ful sa­rongs, one for each day of the week, and my trusty lap­top com­puter (qui­etened gen­era­tor in­stalled)" No wire­less back then, and sadly I had to forgo the baby grand up in my tree house.

I was ab­so­lutely de­ter­mined to get out of the hos­pi­tal as soon as pos­si­ble. I es­caped twice with the help of fam­ily but was po­litely asked to re­turn each time.

I was also de­ter­mined to be out of the wheel­chair, and by us­ing a walker up and down the ward for long slow hours each night of the month I was there, I got strong enough to show the pow­ers that be that I could walk again, us­ing a walk­ing frame. Therefore, they should let me out im­me­di­ately.

            However, their cri­te­ria for re­lease was re­lated to see­ing the MRI (Mag­netic Reso­nance Im­ag­ing) of my brain and spi­nal cord, and my lum­bar punc­ture re­sults, in or­der to de­fine my con­di­tion. Yep! They got their re­sult and I got the of­fi­cial MS di­ag­no­sis.

Spe­cial­ists re­leased me and I was told by the im­mu­nolo­gist best to sell my car, as I would not drive again, and by the neu­rologist to prepare for the worst i.e. further degeneration, with life eventually spent full time in a wheelchair. Very encouraging...

My self image and self esteem has always been strongly identified with my physical abilities and here I was watching myself using my hands to lift my 4 legs (I had double vision) onto the bed . When I tried to walk unaided, I experienced a failure of muscle control in my legs, would have to stand with legs wide apart otherwise I would lose balance and coordination and find myself on the floor. This has the charming name of 'Ataxic gait.' It is not a good look, nor is it fun. Oh yes, I could not write, hold utensils, bathe without assistance, the list goes on. I liked to move and groove. Not crawl on the floor! (Mind you, crawling to the fridge for food was quicker than attempting to walk!) The dancer in me was deeply saddened by the news. This was indeed a challenge.

Over the next nine months, I cried a lot, but I also completely recovered my ability to walk, and speak. There was an intermittent ability to see through the double vision and therefore drive (I had special glasses constructed) Despite my overall physical weakness and many setbacks my deter­mination to be rid of this condition was, and remained, unwavering.

            I have had numerous relapses since 1994 with symptoms immediately obvious to others, head tremor, dysphagia (swallowing difficulty), bouts of speech slurring/drooling (nice!) long and sudden onset of coughing and hiccoughing fits.

There were also additional disturbing hidden symptoms such as pain, altered sensations and cogni­tive problems like memory loss, which came and challenged me over these years. Con­stants were severe neck pain, heat sensitivity, numbness, weakness and L'Hermitte's sign (named after a French neurologist). This is a symptom for those with lesions in the cervical spine. It is an electric shock wave that shoots down the spine into the limbs, a most disturbing sensation. In fact I have heard it termed "The French guy" (hmmmm! prefer a French guy with a different technique than that down my spine; thank you very much!)  

When a relapse occurs it is a struggle to remain positive as you are feeling fearful, terrified actually, of the unknown, the unpredictability, will this debilitate you totally this time, how long will this last, what form will it take this time round? This, compounded by the relapse, hauls you back into an­other round of grief processing.

In addition, the last, but not least, invisible symptom is the constant fatigue.

As many brothers and sisters with the condition reading this would readily affirm, the most consis­tent symptom is that of debilitating fatigue, which can send you to bed for days or weeks and be­yond. It is often difficult for others to appreciate the effects the hidden symptoms have on some­one with this illness, especially regarding employment. In fact, fatigue is one of the major reasons for unemployment among people with MS.

You see, you may, like me, no longer be paralysed or visually impaired. However, you are disabled from the physical phenomenon referred to as motor and sensory fatigue. It is related di­rectly to the disease and often renders you as unable to work as if you were paralysed or had any of the other clinically defined symptoms of MS. A familiar comment I would hear was "But you look so good! For someone with MS."

"Invisible" MS symptoms like fatigue create a unique set of problems. Some people assume that you do not really have an illness, and in my insecure early days, I felt I was perhaps being considered fraudulent. Everyone experiences fatigue, but people with MS are hit hard by a kind of fatigue that can be overwhelming. This can be hard to explain in social situations. People with MS often expend extra effort on activities-such as lifting legs to walk - which once was second nature. These efforts add to the overall burden of fatigue.

THE JOURNEY TO FIND 'THE HEALER WITHIN'

Fortuitous events found me for the first few years in the loving yet tough care of the late Eric McNalley (Eric the Bonecrusher, a Chiropractor & Naturopath) and his committed apprentice Robyn Berkeley. He had been witness to my rapid deterioration in hospital and instructed my fam­ily to get me home, so we could begin treatments that would initiate the return to vitality.

During this time at home, I finally picked up the MS books concerned friends had left for me by my bedside. The literature seemed to list endless possible exacerbations and how to travel fearfully towards a decline into a wheelchair and then eventually death, all reinforced by the medi­cal per­spective.

I threw them all away.

When I had exacerbations, I never went near an injection or a hospital. I never returned to my job in Information Technology, which had been most of my life, as I was consumed with work­ing.

It was not long before I released myself from my denial of my unhealthy lifestyle and rela­tionship as well.

I knew I had to make immense changes and eventually these changes were brought about.

At last, with my perceived securities removed, with no job, relationship or any of my other previous responsibilities, I set out to experience my new lifestyle with 'this thing' called MS. I focus­sed on my rehabilitation, spent time with family and friends and avoided any stressors that would trigger an exacerbation. Easier said than done!

A major part of my rehabilitation involved consultations with Raman Das Mahatyagi, a long time friend and gifted Vaidya (Ayurvedic physician) who continued treating my vitality loss with natural plant and mineral medicines from the Himalayas. His Ayurvedic clinic was in Kathmandu Nepal until he moved to commence practice in Sydney.

Ayurveda is an ancient Indian healing system, which places emphasis on restoring / balanc­ing the internal life force as the fundamental of all treatment. Ayurveda provides us with the tools to understand our nature and live in harmony with it.

Over the past 3 years, I have been blessed to receive chiropractic treatments in conjunction with Neuro-Emotional-Technique (NET) sessions ever so skilfully facilitated by another gifted prac­titioner and friend, chiropractor Matthew Bourke.

Chiropractors believe that spinal joint misalignments, which they call vertebral sub­luxations, interfere with the body's self-regulating mechanisms via the nervous system, re­sulting in bodily dys­function.

I chose these healing modalities as they all aim to balance the innate vital force, and each uniquely affect healing on the cellular level. 
                                                                                                           
In November of 2004, I lay for the first time on the treatment table to receive my first ever-craniosacral session from Simon Green, and another very SIGNIFICANT stage of my healing process began which led me directly to my journey to South America and the following results.

This first session was an extraordinary birthing ... the birthing of my heart. I felt the essence of Ayahuasca (known as Grandmother, and Vine of the Soul) pervading the surrounding space. I could smell Her, She held me in Her arms. She welcomed me Home.

I have since experienced the firmness and gentleness of Her wisdom teachings. For me, She is the purest teacher of the feminine spirit.

One year later the work in my last few sessions in Nov / Dec 2005 found the need for my meeting with the Teacher plants urgently apparent and during those sessions I was shown virtual cellular healing. I saw the mitochondria, the very DNA and I immediately recognised this as the site of my healing. Spirit was directing me to The Medicine. It was time. Simon concurred and I was ready.

           Naturally, Simon wanted to revisit with Grandmother Ayahuasca again, and my process was di­recting us both to San Pedro via Dr. Hampejs.

At that time, we were the only partakers. However many obstacles prevented our atten­dance at Valentin's 2005 Xmas Ceremony Gathering.

In the end, a delayed departure in late January saw Kerrie and Justin join us for the very big adventure to Venezuela.

THE JOURNEY

We arrived in Mérida on Thursday 2 February 2006. I was elated to be meeting the smiling eyed Valentin at the airport. At last, we were here!

Bring it on!

We all embraced each other, jumped into the 4 WD and were off to our posada (inn) where we spent the next two weeks. On the way there, whilst some were experiencing motion sickness from the winding drive up the mountains, Valentin was quizzing me on my current and past health situation and what signs and symptoms I had presently. I had a distinct feeling he was scanning all the personalities around him.

Valentin and his beautiful wife Maria settled us in to our new home and left us with the fol­lowing instructions: to fast the night and the day before each Ceremony. We would be collected at 2.30 pm on the day of the Ceremony and driven to Valentin's property, where we would gather by 3 pm at the Ceremony site to prepare for the all-night rituals.

After our long flights, we gladly spent the next few days resting in preparation for our first Cere­mony on Sunday afternoon February 5.

On the afternoon of the first Ceremony, Simon and Valentin spent time consulting with each other then joined us at the Ceremony site, along with Maria. After this discussion, Valentin an­nounced to Kerrie, Simon and Justin that they had been given new spiritual names and they were instructed that these names were to be utilised for the duration of time in Ceremony, and whilst living to­gether between Ceremonies.

Curiously, I was then instructed to choose my own name.

In retrospect, I feel that at this very moment the spirit of the plants was already entering my heart. I immediately found myself choosing the Hindu goddess of abundance, LAKSHMI (pro­nounced Lucksh-mee) and during the coming rituals, I became aware that I was invoking and im­mersing myself in her qualities.

                         

                                                            SHAMANIC FIRE ALTAR

As I uttered her name I found myself emptied of the immense apprehension, of which I am not hesitant to tell you, I had lots! I was aware that opening to the flow of what was happening in the moment was what I had always wanted. In Ceremony Lakshmi guided me to remain open to the mystery, open to the energy of the plants, open to keeping the way clear in order to allow the plants' energy to move through me freely.

I have always loved the sound of her name - Lakshmi - it is a luscious, juicy sound, the sound of flowing water, a name full of life force. AII of these images highlighted what had been taken from me because my nervous system was so frayed and so fried.

And so with our new names in place we gathered to hear Valentin give us a Super-­Download of the content of his book 'Shamanic Ecstasy of Consciousness', published in German. Luckily, we got the English version - Valentin speaks numerous languages and occasionally likes to mix it up!

We then proceeded to lie down for a tobacco juice hit administered via nasal ingestion. Be­lieve me, you don't want to know!... but for those who do the reason for the nasal ingestion of the to­bacco juice is that the nasal nerves are the shortest of the human body going directly to the brain, thus the tobacco can stimulate it very directly with its medicinal vibration.

After three hours of protective and purifying prayers and invocations offered to a cross sec­tion of deities (both Christian and Vedic, as well as the celestial archangels and indigenous warrior an­cestors) it was now time to drink!

My ignition (actually that should read initiation but it works just as well!) began with being offered the first drink! Equally surprising was that I was offered the combination of Ayahuasca and San Pedro. I had been expecting to take solely (soul­Iy?) San Pedro for all my healing ceremonies. In my internal story, it was to be just Shiva meeting with Ayahuasca this night.

I was thrown. My mind was protesting Valentin’s decision, he had made a mistake. I was thinking 'No, Valentin, pass the Ayahuasca down the line to Shiva.'

However, to challenge the maestro now was not appropriate behaviour. I recovered, jolted into thinking 'If you are going to have expectations then EXPECT THE UNEXPECTED!' Therefore, with my attention now strongly focussed on my healing intention, I respectfully swallowed the glass of the Divine brew. Durga, Shiva, Christopher, and then Valentin followed suit.         .

It looked far from divine and was the most uninviting brownish blackish greenish tamarind, most viscous looking, and bitter tasting liquid. In addition, everyone's face showed it!

We now settled round the site with instructions to keep the medicine within for as long as possible. Maybe an hour or so passed. I felt over­taken by a drowsy dreamy state of lethargy fol­lowed by a sense of peacefulness. This was followed by feeling distinctly chilly.

Then the urge to purge just took over!

I thought 'I’ll just stand up and go throw up.' Simple! However, in the process of getting up­right immense waves of dizziness took over. So much so that I had to hang on to the bamboo poles that supported the roof over the site. Despite that, the urge continued to force me out, still very unstable, to the field for my first heave!

I did not stay in the field long first time round.

I had been feeling that Ayahuasca had been gentle with me, but as I attempted to make my wobbly way back to the fire, Valentin came to meet me on the Path of Purge and encouraged me to step into the field again with him. He kindly demonstrated advanced vomiting techniques, and firmly gave me instructions in vomiting 101 i.e. How to Purge FULLY. I will not go into details but fingers and throat were involved! I was also told to get seriously vocal on the subject of the DIS­GUSTING, VILE, PUTRID matter being thrown upwards and outwards.

Gracias Senor! A shamanic art form indeed! (I went to finishing school, people! There were no linen serviettes to dab one's lips with afterwards out here!)

After successful results in this newly recognised art form, I manoeuvred my way back down the path and I recall looking up to see Shiva, Durga and Christopher had all returned from the field and were sitting behind and at the side of the sacred fire. However, I found myself sitting on Valen­tin's seat in front of the sacred fire, mainly because I could not stagger another step further! There was to be plenty more stagger, stagger crawl crawling to be had in future ceremonies. Oye!

           Valentin was not far behind me. He then prepared a strong substance called Agua de Flor­ida to settle my stomach. Gracias! It made a huge difference to the nausea I was experiencing.

Valentin sat down beside me and began to sing more devotional songs. We all sat. The hours passed, Valentin's story telling continued. On this particular night, one of those stories in­cluded a body story belonging to me - a story that led to a healing in that very first Ceremony.

          As I said Valentin was sitting next to me on the wooden seat from where he directed Ceremony, quietly puffing on his pipe when he sud­denly turned to me and asked had there been abuse in my family?

"No!" I said but I really felt that what he meant was had I been abused.

"You mean me?" I asked to clarify.

"Yes! Were you abused as a child?"

I was silent, unable to answer immediately. I found myself swinging my legs like a ten-year-old girl, feeling withdrawn but drawn into the spot­light to reveal a story I did not even know I had! This situation made me feel very uncomfortable. I felt really vulnerable and exposed in front of those present who were not familiar to me.

I did not respond until Valentin asked again, "Have you ever been sexually abused?"

Bear in mind that I was feeling completely incredulous at the direction the Medicine was taking, and all my responses seemed to me to be much laboured.

I said, "Err  ... umm ...," The ten year old was starting to remember some things.

“Yes or no?" asked Valentin firmly.

“Well, yes!"

"Was it a family member?"

"No."

"An uncle?"

“No."

"Someone you knew?"

"Yes"

"Who?"

"It was a priest."

            "Aaaaaha! Hmmmm…" was Valentin's response,

The releasing had begun.

I have read since my return home that the goal of the maestro curandero is to make his pa­tient "bloom" during the ceremony, to make the subconscious "open like a flower."

This proved to be a most beautiful and perfect metaphor for the night's unfolding.

           Valentin and I were now facing each other, with me still incredulous at this discovery, when sud­denly the Medicine began to speak to me directly.

I felt as if the Medicine had taken over my body searching, investigating my cells. I ob­served Valentin's smiling face morphing into the most exquisite slideshow of geometric and filigree pat­terns.

I remained lucid yet I was sensing the Medicine weaving and coursing through me in the same way that the patterns were dancing on Valentin's face. Nature's consciousness expressing itself magnificently to me.

Just like Valentin had in the field earlier that night, the Medicine was once again firmly in­structing me "Allow the healing Lakshmi, release …flow … remember your requests … pen up …keep open­ing … TRU ST  … Surrender … keep  opening to the Truth."

The moment I surrendered to the Plants' wisdom, I felt my cells receive the gifts with which I had hoped they might deem to grace me.

It was a powerful, definitive and humbling moment. A moment that still takes my breath away at its memory.

During this night's healing, my soul finally released the guilt imposed upon me by Catholi­cism during my childhood, as punishment for having my sexuality awakened at an early age. I had unconsciously been burdened by the impact of this, my "soul's wounding".

Jungian analyst Marion Woodman calls the burial of trauma in the body "Psy­chotic Corners." John Upledger uses the term "energetic cysts.” Stanislov Grof calls the same phe­nomena "an area of con­densed experience or COEX”. I prefer to use the term "archaic wound.”

Archaic wounds tend to be locked away in the body, stored in a kind of time capsule. When you reach them, the body tends to lock - freeze up, as when startled, but if there is enough trust pre­sent, the memories begin to unwind and the time capsule releases its con­tents. The client will be back in the event, experiencing all of its smells, sounds, sights, and distress. Taken from 'The Heart of Lis­tening”. Author / Craniosacral Therapist: Hugh Milne.

For almost half a lifetime, the Plants' wisdom dramatically revealed this wound and with seemingly impeccable timing proceeded to reveal and bestow the healing wisdom of true forgive­ness and compassion upon me.

Forgiveness heals guilt. If there is no forgiveness the wound works its way deeper. The body stiff­ens, for movement accesses the wound: we also avoid deep feelings lest they touch it. Suppress­ing anger, we create bitterness: feelings stuffed down through overeating cause biliousness and liver dysfunction, which can lead to migraine, or years later to cancer, ultimately death. Only the client who is willing and able to release past anger can let go of this migraine pattern, and this of­ten means considering a new identity- "Who would I be if I was no longer angry at my ex-wife? What would I do with all the unaccustomed new energy I would suddenly have available to me? (My God, I would have to LIVE!) Once the wound is gone, we still remember the incident. If the trauma involved the death of a loved one, we can recall the person without guilt. There is no at­tendant flood of stormy emotions. The dream­body does not enter a new round of depression or recrimination. The other people involved in the original trauma, whether dead or alive, are now seen simply and clearly as human beings fulfilling their agendas. Taken from the Heart of Listening by author and Craniosacral Thera­pist Hugh Milne.  

There was more releasing, and then more releasing and I believe more releasing over what felt like most of the early hours of that morning.

I found the relentless intention of the Medicines to be a loving yet firm, gentle yet tough ini­tiation into their wisdom teachings.

In those early morning hours, with my 'supreme ordeal' appearing to have subsided, I peered through joyful tears across and beyond the sacred fire to acknowledge and honour the protective presence of the powerful Guardians surrounding us all during the night's Ceremony.

My focus then moved to my tribe around the fire. There I discovered I was the recipient of a pow­erful stream of unconditional love. This was flowing into me from the beaming smiles and happy hearts of Shiva, Durga and Christopher. They had travelled with me all through my initiation and vigilantly held space for me through that remarkable and miraculous night.

Feeling euphoric, I turned to my left and there was Valentin sitting beside me once again, looking into the fire, puffing on his pipe as though he had never shifted the whole night.

                                          

                                                                       ENERGETIC CLEANSING

The Medicines and the Maestro, what a blessed collaboration of powerful healing forces.

I was indeed in fine company all around!

The sound of the church bells tolling at 6 am informed that dawn was approaching and the greatly anticipated Water Ceremony would soon be performed. After no water for 12 hours or more it was sure to be sublime nectar. Along with the sun's arrival over the mountain's ridgeline came Maria to perform the morning Offerings of Thanksgiving and to partake in the Purification Cere­mony.

Our next exquisite moment was one of basking in the new day's sunshine, communing over Maria's delicious breakfast. Every mouthful a blissful taste explosion.

And so our first night's ritual drew to a close.

 *******

 There are so many stories from every other Ceremony to share and to detail here would take pages. Instead, I have chosen and dramatically condensed some of 'The Moments' from each, knowing that language is inadequate to express these most EXTRAORDINARY, SOULFUL and LIFE-CHANGING experiences.

I went on to do another five ceremonies.

                                     

                                                         SHAMANIC POWER HIKE

One of these Ceremonies included a 4hr shamanic power hike up in the Sierra Nevada mountain jungles where we ingested San Pedro at a Ceremony site about 11/2 hours into the hike. After an­other hour, we arrived at the waterfall named Dragon’s Veins! There each of us underwent an in­tense and powerful energy healing. The healing transmissions and communion with nature and animal spirits was potent for everyone.

I was leaning against a boulder warming in the sun when Valentin appeared beside me. I turned to him and placed Shiva's akubra hat that I had been wearing onto his head. In an instant, he had morphed into a beautiful Aboriginal Elder whose smiling face then shifted to one of im­mense an­guish. I felt this Elder's heart breaking; I felt his devastation and the overwhelming grief for the wounds of his people, our indigenous brothers and sisters. The instruction from San Pedro was that we must find the Elders to affect the healings. Somewhere in our tears, the Elder ap­proached me to make the most desperate plea of a promise to quest this healing.

The fourth Ceremony was solely with Ayahuasca.

In this Ceremony, I found myself initially dealing with most of the symptoms the disease en­tity had delivered in my initial attack, which you have read about already. I was spared the head­ache. Gra­cias Grandmother!

ENERGETIC PURGE


I was very concerned about these symptoms but Valentin assured me they would pass after more purging. After MUCH more purging and saying to myself and to Durga that I will NEVER do this again, I crawled my way back to the fire still accompanied by nausea and dizziness. I found myself sitting upright, still and silent for most of the long hours of Ceremony between many bouts of crawling to purge out in the field, and at some point after the nausea and dizziness subsided, in my stillness I was delivered into a state of grace, my heart overflowing with love, the receptor of pro­found healing transmissions from Grandmother Ayahuasca. Again, She welcomed me Home.

Sadly, Durga made her departure a few days after this Ceremony to return home and this void in the group process found us making a decision to post pone further Ceremonies, giving the three of us a much needed rest to allow further assimilation and integration of the Medicines.

Six days later, after several group discussions, Shiva, Christopher and Valentin partook in another Ayahuasca Ceremony. I chose to rest and assimilate for another few days.

Our final Ceremony included two Ceremonies in one day, another Shamanic Power hike and an evening Ayahuasca Ceremony.

This time we took a two-hour walk into the Andes Mountains near Valentin's home to par­take in another amazing waterfall dowsing at Los Leones (The Lions) and to ingest San Pedro. Again, the elemental presence was very strong at this site. While Christopher and Shiva returned to com­mune with those elementals at the waterfall. Valentin and I discussed mythology and Jung by the fire and San Pedro shared his emotional version of the Grail Myth for me.

Sadly, it was soon time to return.

I experienced strong hallucinatory effects along with a somewhat legless state on the walk (not helpful when one is hiking) back to Valentin's house. I also felt a distinctive hardening on en­tering civilisation. Arriving at Valentin's home, I found that lying down on the earth next to the San Pedro garden was the panacea for that hard edge sensation. There the three of us lay totally blissing out on Pachamama (Mother Earth). A heartspace that remains with me forever!

Shiva's rest was brief, his work commencing again with the need to attend to the immense ener­gies present. Soon the all-pervading sound of the Yidaki was heard with Shiva delivering the land­scape a most powerful healing. Now with the dark entities powerfully forced out and the inten­sity eased off the transition into the evening Ceremony was apparent.

Valentin suggested we continue on down to the Ceremony site.

By 5 pm, a long day had passed already. I felt done or perhaps I was just undone. This feeling was soon turned around by the enjoyment of watching Valentin, Maria and their children, Alejandro and Emmanuel as they prepared the site for the evening's ritual. The magical swordplay of Emmanuel, their youngest son, in particular was a delight.

This was followed by a visit from Mescalito, the playful and mischievous spirit of both the San Pedro and Peyote cactus. He had come to meet with, and acknowledge Valentin for his long and devoted service. I was hoping he would stay for the whole night's Ceremony as I found their heartfelt camaraderie and Mescalito's energy most uplifting. I felt a shared disappointment be­tween the three of us at his departure.

Three hours later with Valentin's protective prayers and invocations completed, it was time to drink. We respectfully drank of Grandmother Ayahuasca.

The night ahead proved to be long and laboured with lots of purging.

The indigenous warriors of the earth surrounded us this night. The Yidaki sang the spirits of the Australian Aboriginal into Ceremony, expressing their grief at the damage caused to the land and her people. We cried the painful tears of the land and her people, and cried the tears of all of us who are so sorry.

The purgings seemed to occur with synchronicity at times with The Medicine showing me scenes of environmental harm, sexual themes and delivered profound transmissions from Mother Earth showing Her healing through women, sacred dance and song.

The Church bells at 6 am then the Dawn and the Water Ceremony provided an immensely wel­come respite and some relief from the night's predominantly dark and arduous ritual.

A few hours later, the arrival of María to offer Thanksgiving and Food drew our final Cere­mony to a close.

On the following Sunday March 5, after heartfelt farewells with Valentin, Maria and family, Shiva and Christopher accompanied me to Mérida Airport to begin my return home. I sadly left my broth­ers there and flew to Caracas then onto Buenos Aires.

There, I, the dancer, slipped on my shoes and danced the Tango!

Since my return home, I can share the wonderful news that I have

NO SIGN OF THAT DEBILITATING FATIGUE!

Now to close my story, this story that will live with me and in me for the rest of my life, a sin­cere attempt to begin to express the inexpressible...

        With the deepest Gratitude, I honourably bow to the Supreme Spirit.
Who directs my every step on this Earth Walk

Om Paramatmane Namaha

To the Goddess Lakshmi for delivering her abundant graces.

Om Shrim Maha Lakshmiyei Swaha

And to the Celestial Physician Dhanvantre.

For his skilful means

Om Shri Dhanvantre Namaha

        With the deepest Gratitude, I honourably bow to the Sacred Teacher Plants. 
For gifting me their healing wisdom. For their powerful and precise insight into my wounding and for deeming to share with me by direct transmission information in respect to the healing of this ancient land and her people. Thank You.                           

With the deepest Gratitude, I honourably bow to Mescalito.    

SAN PEDRO - WACHUMA - MESCALITO

The spirit guide of the San Pedro and Peyote cactus for gracing us with your DeLightFul company during Ceremonies. Such a privilege to experience your energy, Senor. Thank you.

With the deepest Gratitude, I honourably bow to Shiva my precious brother. 

Om Namah Shivaya.

For your human beingness. For revealing to me who I Be. For your revealing who you Be. For sharing with me the unimaginable within those vast and immense worlds, you move in. For your unbelievable abilities in the employment of your extraordinary gifts. For holding my hand all the way to the threshold. For your ever constant and dutiful vigilance in this realm and those be­yond. For your humility and your humour. I am forever blessed to be your hermana. Thank you.

With the deepest Gratitude, I honourably bow to dearest Valentin.

           For your masterful facilitation of the Shamanic Ecstasy of Consciousness.

           Christopher stated in one of his tales of you  "Shaman of experience and pedigree not explica­ble without sitting with him." Well, I have sat with you in and out of Ceremony and most readily concur. Shiva and I both felt you to be 'Our Man in the Andes' well before meeting you and little time passed in your company before our heart's knowing was confirmed. For your constancy of care, love and warm hospitality during our stay with you and your beautiful family. Valentin your faith, compassion and humility is an inspiration. With my utmost respect and love. Thank you.
                                             

With the deepest Gratitude, I honourably bow to Durga.

For BEING THERE! How unthinkable that you nearly did not join us! We have shared many amazing experiences to date but some of the experiences shared in Ceremony and on this journey felt to be, for me, the poetic expression of the beauty of our soul's connection. Your part to play in the group process recognisable, your departure a huge void for us and a painful separation for you, precious sister. For your loving hand of friendship by joining me in support of my healing and for your constancy of care, protection and concern All these years leading up to this journey. Thank You.

                        With the deepest Gratitude, I honourably bow to dear Christopher.

For your constant encouragement. For your very own Saint's patience with my attempts at Spanish conversation; for sharing your precious “Oreos” with me; for all the fun you provided, all the laughter (you have much joy in you!) and all the tears. Christopher, in your wildest dreams would you have ever envisaged such physical, emotional or spiritual rides and encounters as those ex­traordinary moments of Battle and Bliss we experienced and were witness to? For sharing it all, brother. 

Thank you.

           With the deepest Gratitude, I honourably bow to Edna. 

For our hearts connected at our first meeting and remain so. I will never forget your loving sup­port during our stay in Venezuela. I will always remember your beautiful smiling face greeting us in the morning sun, to share your prayers of gratitude and heavenly breakfast, after our long nights of Ceremony. Our experiences have connected us all forever. Thank you so much heart sister.

With the deepest Gratitude I honourably bow to you dear reader 
for hearing the stories of my hu­man soul's wounding and that of our precious Mother Earth's. Thank You.

I leave you for now with the following lines from "Here AII Dwell Free" by Gertrude Mueller Nelson: 

Our responsibility, then, is to find and know the story that is our own. We then reach out to grapple with it, choosing to suffer the conflicts that pull us back into our fate and for­ward to our true selves. As we become healed and autonomous, we re-enter our community and our history, offering our gifts to benefit all and taking our place as co-­creators of our per­sonal and communal destinies. AII three of these tasks, though developmental in nature, are not necessarily done in stair-step order, but cycle around and around, deeper and deeper, as we grow in consciousness and responsibility ....  Only where we allow ourselves to be fully human can Spirit meet us, and here we encounter our true selves, as if for the first time. Here all dwell free.

In the words of the Lakota Sioux: Aho Mitukuye Oyasin – To all my relations,
We are all one family!

One Love, Lakshmi